


Say You'll Stay-Slow updates

by LittleToxic



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Another story, Artificial Intelligence, Bad Ending, Cults, Drama, Dry Humping, Dubious Consent, F/M, Firsts, Kidnapping, Loss of Virginity, Manipulation, NSFW, Obsession, POV Second Person, Psychological Drama, Romance, Saeran Choi - Freeform, Semi-Spoilers, Smut, Stockholm Syndrome, Triggers, Unhealthy Relationships, Villains, Virgin Saeran, Virtual Reality, mentions of abuse, sloppy sex, trigger - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-11
Updated: 2017-10-16
Packaged: 2018-12-26 16:08:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 22,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12062445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleToxic/pseuds/LittleToxic
Summary: ~This loosely (Super loosely) follows Day 1-5 of Another Story V route. This will not follow Saeran route at all for this story will stand on its and be based mostly on what we knew about Saeran on Seven's route. This only focuses on the relationship between Saeran and MC while using elements of the five days of V route. Everything else is made up by me. Sooo if you are afraid of spoilers please don't read!~Will contain dubious consent.YN=Your NameSaeran: "I was itching to talk to her. To come close. To convince her to come with me. She would be the perfect tester. She doesn't know that I can free her from the cage she is in, but soon she'll know. Soon, I'll put her in a cage of my own. A cage I am sure she will love more than the one she is in. If I keep her away from this corrupted world long enough...she will get used to my presence. She'll know that I don't want to harm her, at least not in the way she's been harmed out here, salvation hurts. I can't do much about that-- but I can soothe her. I can protect her if she is mine. Will she allow me close? Will she let me touch her? It doesn't matter if you say no, YN,  you are mine and I have the right to every inch of you."





	1. Finally

**Author's Note:**

> Not really sure where I am going with this story yet :) So if you have thoughts let me know.

“Please! Someone help me!”

The chance Saeran has been waiting for was here. All those weeks following you around. Watching you interact with others. Giving your smile to those that didn’t deserve it. He could finally take you. Your smile. Your kindness all of it would be his. This was an opportunity that he couldn’t waste. 

You punch Jae with all your might. It only pushes him back long enough for you to duck under the arms that cage you and try to run inside the bar once more that resounds with music. Music that drowns your screams. You jog up the three stairs and your fingers only graze the handle as your pulled back by the hair roughly and thrown to the ground. Your pantyhose rip with your scraped knee.

“Why are you doing this?! We are friends!”

He crouches and grabs a fistful of your hair. He pulls it back so he can see your features under the dim streetlight.

“Friends? I didn’t want to be your friend. You denied me because you think you’re better than me. So now--”

A sinister smile breaks the humble features that he was so known for. This friend that you have known for six months now. Things begin to make sense. His insistence on bringing you to this part of town. His slowly gaining your trust. All for this? This wasn’t the first time you were betrayed by someone you trusted.

 “I am going to take what I wanted from you since the beginning. I’ll teach you what happens to those that deny me!”

He struggles over you against the dirty alley. His stocky build takes your kicks and your scratches as you continue to scream until his large hand seals your mouth and nose. You hear and feel the front of your shirt rip under his unforgiving clutch.

_Please! Please, someone, help me! Anyone!_

Your eyes roll back from the lack of oxygen. Your temples throb and with a gasp you are able to breathe again. There is shock in Jae’s eyes and it is until now that you notice the man squatting beside him with a revolver pressed tightly on his neck.

“Let her go or I’ll decorate your brains all over this alley, you scum.”

“L-look man,” he stammers as Saeran grabs him by the hair as he did you. You slide away from him and immediately run behind the hooded stranger. “It is a misunderstanding--”

Saeran doesn’t let him continue when he pistol whips him across the head a couple of times. Jae who seemed so strong and menacing falls with a groan. You jump when the stranger turns to you. His eyes are mint colored, what you can see of his hair under the hoodie, looks platinum.

“Are you okay?” He asks, but he can see you are not.

 You are trembling and your mascara has run in black streaks down your cheeks. You nod anyway.

“Thank you. Could you please stay with me until the police come?”

“I am afraid I can’t do that,” he says with a smile. “I can’t have the police take you away from me.” 

You grip the remnants of your shirt tight as your eyes widen. “B-but you saved me from him. I thought you were the hero,” You mutter staring over his shoulder at Jae’s unconscious body.

He laughs and places the cold steel of his pistol on the underside of your jawline forcing you to look up. “I am no hero and I am not going to just save you from that man--I am going to save you from this world, too.”

With his free hand, he finds the self-injecting syringe in his jacket and rips your pantyhose further. You squeal. You try to look down but his pistol keeps you looking up. You eye the way his fingers graze your skin under the sheer material. You don’t see how he gulps. Your skin arousing things in him he had never felt before.

“Don’t be afraid," he says clearing his throat. "I am not going to kill you. This will only put you to sleep since the location I am taking you to is secret.”

Just as you are about to speak, or beg, you feel the needle prick you. You jump at the sudden pain. He puts the pistol away and you take the opportunity to lunge upright and run away. The alley begins looking hazy. You don't know which of the three doors you see is the door that leads inside the bar. The street in front of you blurs.

He stands and slides the empty syringe in his pocket. “You are going to fall and hurt yourself, YN,” he says concernedly, walking to you.

You turn around to face him, the entire alley spinning now. “H-how…do you…know name?” You sound so breathless.

He closes the distance and you automatically slump over him. Your forehead pressed on his chest. He wraps his arms around your hips and then shifts to carry you in his arms. Your eyes struggle to stay open as he looks down at you with a satisfied smile.

“I know almost everything about, YN. You are the one I have chosen.”

“Chosen?” you breathe out between consciousness and unconsciousness. 

“Yes,” he says walking out of the alley and heading to the car that waits for him right across the street. “You are the one I chose to spend paradise with forever." You black out. The arms that cradle you making you feel warm and comforted, even though you are being kidnapped.

The last thing you hear before you are swallowed by the dark abyss is: "Let's go home, YN," said in that deep smooth voice.

 


	2. Good Morning

Your eyes flutter open, and you shift in the comfort of a large plush bed decorated in pale pink. You want to turn on your side and snuggle on the pillows around you. It smells so sweet in here. You don’t remember having a bed so large.

“I am glad you’re awake, YN,” Saeran says standing from the corner loveseat. 

You immediately gasp and realize that you don't know where you are. You squint as he parts the white curtain ruffled with pink and let’s sunlight inside. You sit up and stare down at yourself. You are wearing a long nightgown. You are braless, and you notice that you are pantiless too. Fear immediately seizes you as you remember the events of last night.

“How did you sleep?” he says with that indecipherable smile stopping to stand at the foot of your bed. He looks like he walked out of a fairytale book in that ruffled blouse and pink overcoat. “I had a meeting. That is why I am dressed this way,” he says noticing how you eye him. He straightness the blue rose on the breast of his jacket and continues staring at you. 

“D-did you,” you stammer staring down at the pale pink nightgown. You wrap your arms over your breasts.

He chuckles gathering your implication. “Oh, don’t worry. I didn’t touch you. It is too soon for us to explore each other’s bodies, but I am looking forward to the day.”

Your eyes almost bulge out of their sockets, and your ears begin to burn. “Are you crazy?! You kidnapped me!” You clutch the thick covers embroidered with gold threading. “I want to go home! Just what is this place?!”

What he doesn’t tell you is that he didn’t dress you. He had one of his female underlings do that for him, but the shock on your face is satisfying. It makes him wait with eagerness the day he can truly have you. Your body, your emotions, your mind. 

“This place is called Mint Eye. It is a place of salvation and acceptance for everyone. And as far as your home goes, I don’t think anyone is waiting for you at home is there?”

He knows the answer to that, and you bite your lower lip as your heart sinks. He walks over to the white wooden vanity table and fingers the portrait of you and your father. “This is the only picture you had at your tiny apartment.”

You get out of bed and rush towards him ready to attack, but you are taking aback by how tired he looks when he turns to face you. He elevates the portrait out of your reach as you continue taking him in.  He has some light dark circles that just seem to enhance his beauty instead of taking it away, and he is pale. Much paler than you. 

“Give it to me!” You say between clenched teeth. He ignores your words and stares at how you jump up after it. Your breasts move in perfect gravity. He inhales the urge to touch them. How would they feel in his mouth? Soft no doubt. Perfect to lay against.

“Here,” he says handing it to you composing himself.  He then goes to the middle of the room and spins. “This room is yours. You can decorate all you want although I picked everything based on your tastes—wallpaper, ceiling decorations, small props. I picked it out myself. Thinking of you.” 

He stops and smiles at you again. You slide a finger over the frame of a man holding a little brown-haired girl and place it back on the vanity with a sad sigh. You notice all of your stuff is here. Your makeup, your perfumes, all perfectly arranged. Your heart jumps in your chest, but you are not scared of him. 

He has taken you away, and you are not afraid of him! The realization hits you hard. 

You turn to face him. “I can’t stay here. I have friends that will be looking for me.”

He frowns and clenches his black gloved hands. “You mean those people in the shelter you help out?”

“Yes,” you say, not sure how he knows, but given that all your things are here and he has picked out things that are your taste, you assume he has been stalking you for awhile. “They’ll look for me. They will call the police.”

“Don’t worry about that. I have everything worked out.”

“What do you mean?” You ask concerned. 

He goes to you making you catch your breath when he is just an inch away from you. He looks down at you and caresses the bottom of your chin, his thumb over your lips. Your heart beats so fast. You are afraid of him and yet oddly attracted to him. This man is crazy. There is no doubt about that. You try to catch something from his expression, but all you can tell is the fact that he wears contacts. That mint color is not his. The way he watches you makes you gulp tightly. 

“I hacked into your phone and sent emails to your relatives and your administrator at the shelter you work at. I told them that you are moving overseas! Fortunately, your aunt and  cousin don’t care much for you, do they?”

Your jaw clenches in pain as he continues playing with your lips—tracing them, pulling the bottom lip down so he can see your teeth and then let it go back to its place. Your eyes gloss over at the thought of how lonely you really are.

 “I am sorry,” he says blinking and then giving you some space. His back half-turned.  “I understand the feeling of not being loved by your loved ones and feeling worthless.”

“How dare you,” you mumble in the verge of tears and in the verge to explode in your anger.

“You and I share a lot in common. That is why I can’t let you go. No one will look for you so stay by my side, okay?” He smiles again, and that smile on that face pushes you to the edge. You lunge at him and taking him by surprise and manage to slap him hard across the face.

He is too stunned for words. 

“You are crazy! Don't compare me to you. You can’t keep me here by force. You won’t get away with this.”

He rubs his cheek and smiles again, his eyes tapering to slits. “But I have gotten away with it. Please don’t hate me too much. Don’t you understand that it has to be you? No one else can take your place. I have been watching you from the very start.”

When you try to strike him again, he grabs your wrists and squeezes it tight. He leans towards you as if to kiss you and grabs your other wrist pinning you in place. 

“I don’t want your stay to be uncomfortable, but you must learn the rules. I am afraid that I have to punish you for striking me.” You feel his warm breath on your face as he catches the length of your neck, the dip of the hollow of your throat, the plunge of your nightgown that reveals the tops of your breasts. Your breathing gets shaky under his scrutiny, and he startles you when he says. “There are so many things I want to do with you that I am having trouble holding myself back, YN. What should I do?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	3. Unwanted

**~Triggers. Implied abuse.~**

**I am having trouble holding myself back, YN. What should I do?**

He scans your face, the shocked look on your features. Your (color) eyes so full of emotion. Your lips parted as you process his words. All of it is so enticing. He wished he could hack your brain and program you to like only him, not knowing what you're thinking drives him crazy.

“I have waited for you for so long and watched you in silence. Having you here in front of me,” he tugs you into an embrace, your arms between your bodies, his grip tight on your wrists. You can hear how hard he breathes against your ear when he leans forward and takes in your scent. That his as he inhales. You smell just as he thought you would. Like cotton candy. “It’s unreal that it is really you. I am so happy that I’m actually afraid.” His nose presses against the base of your neck, it's cold.

You swallow and stiffen at feeling him so close. The honesty in his voice scares you. The obsession in it doesn't though.

“I knew that no matter how many of those little boyfriends you had, that you’d eventually end up with me. Did you enjoy making me jealous?”

“I-I,” you begin to mumble. Your skin goose bumps when his lips make contact with your skin, just a little brush with his bottom lip that is a bit too dry.  Your body doesn’t react the way it reacted when you tried to be intimate with the men of your past. Why is it different with him? Why do you want him to keep holding on to you, just like this? “I-I don’t even know who you are.” You say that in response to his question and response to the way your body reacts to him. It responds as if it had always known him...

He props up straight pulling you along with him that you crash slightly against the ruffles that decorate the front of his shirt.  

“That’s okay. We have more than enough time to get to know each other. I know a lot about you as it is. I hope you will make an effort to get to know me since we will be together from now on.”

“What do you know about me?”

You are afraid. You fear that he will throw your past out in the open.

“I know you are scared of the dark.”

He finally let’s go, and you rub your wrists still feeling the clutch of his fingers. He is tall and lean, and his leanness hides just how strong he is. 

He puts his index finger on his chin looking up at the ceiling. “I know that you get night terrors. So, I wondered what the reason for that could be.” He looks at you again. His gaze all knowing. “I hacked into some private records and found out why your uncle doesn’t live with your aunt and the reason he is rotting in jail.”

You shake your head in disbelief. You slam your hands over your ears.

“Your cousin blames you for taking her father away. Your aunt blames you for taking her husband even though it was him who took advantage of you. Isn’t that unfair?”

“Shut up!” You yell squatting on the ground, wanting to mute his words.

He drops to the floor with you and grabs your forearms forcing you to listen. Is he punishing you? Punishing by revealing the disgusting aspects of your past. The things that you have repressed in the back of your mind.

Your glossy eyes meet his mint stare. You are like a deer in the headlights about to be run over, and he aches for you. 

 “You have to face your past. It will be no use for you to bury it! Stop that disgusting self-pity! Your mother abandoned you and your father to go after wealth. Your father died in a car accident soon after. Your mother wanted nothing to do with you and paid an allowance to your aunt to keep you in her home. You are unwanted! The only one that wanted you was that sick uncle of yours.”

And me...

“Stop it!” You scream, balling your fists and landing blows. Where? You are not sure, but before you know it, you are running towards the door. Your tears are cascading down your cheeks.

He swipes the back of his hand over his bleeding nose and grabs your ankle before you reach the front door. You fall on your face buried in the carpet. You taste the salt of your tears at the back of your throat. The physical pain of your landing aches through your limbs.

“Why are you doing this to me?” You ask sobbingly. He doesn’t answer, all you feel is the crowdedness and pressure of his body as he crawls over you.

“Because I want to protect you,” he says into your hair, his forehead pressed on the back of your head. “Keeping your emotions bottled inside will do you no good. It is best if you express your anger."

“No,” you cry, “I can’t.”

“You can’t? Are you afraid it will make you look ugly? Don’t worry about that. To me, you will always be the most precious there is no need to hide from me. I will never abandon you like they did. I will be there through your darkness, through your tears, through your hate. I will be there on your loneliest night. All I want is for you to stay.”

Your eyes widen. This stranger gives to you so quickly what no one has ever given you just as long as you stay by his side? Why?

“Why me?” you whisper so low, that if he weren't as close as he was, he wouldn't have heard.

He shifts his body until he is flat against you, his body conforming to your every line. Your leg locked between his legs. You can feel the softness of his manhood. You turn your face to the side and his quickly molds to yours, temple to temple. The slight heaviness on your body feels calming. At the same time, you feel like a deer under the jaws of a predator. You're ready for him to rip your throat out.  

“You and I share more in common than you think, remember? Will you despise me because I am keeping you here by force?”

You don’t answer because his hips grind against your thigh and you can feel it. You can feel his arousal building, his member hardening as he explores the tightening between his legs. How this contact, even through material, is enough to take him over the edge. His hips move exploratory at first until he finds a rhythm, a pace that rubs entirely on his cock.

 “Don’t worry,” he groans when he hears your slight whimper, “I want our first time to be special. I just want to enjoy you just like this,” he grinds again, giving you feel at the velvet steel underneath, so hard, and soft at the same time. You feel so nice, vibrating, and breathing underneath him. He continues to thrust gently, rubbing his covered length over the length of your thigh. You hear the catch in his breath as his pace begins to quicken, each time stroking faster. Getting closer. Imagining he slides inside your warmth. Imagining himself buried balls deep inside you. He kisses your wet cheeks, your temples. “Do you feel it, YN? Do you feel how hard you make me? I’ve dreamt of this day for so long, but I am virgin you see. I want you to change that soon."

Your eyes widen at his words even though you are painfully aware at the friction of his erection with your thigh, you shift slightly arching back, and then he freezes as he thrusts once, twice, and grinds his teeth coming in his pants.

He lays on you breathing hard, and when his breathing evens out, you don't know how long you both remain that way. When he finally does move, you feel cold and extra cold on the moisture left on the back of your thigh. You miss the warmth of his body. He kisses your temple before he stands up.

“I’ve enjoyed my time with you, but I have to go.”

You don’t answer as you finally sit up. Your body aching slightly when you tuck your legs underneath you.

“Are you really not letting me go?"

"No. I hope you come to terms with that soon. I don't want it to be a painful experience for you."

"And if I don't come to terms? If I don't want to stay?"

 He stops on his way out and turns to you. You see the wet spot on the front of his brown pants confirming that fact that this guy with that platinum hair with pink streaks actually dry humped you. If he wanted, he could've fucked you, but he didn't. He held back even though he said he couldn't. You feel a slight disappointment, but you bite it down. 

_You're not crazy. Stop thinking stupid things._

"You're staying here willingly or by force. I am not letting you go. You are mine."

You clench your fists.

“I didn’t punish you because you are still getting used to your surroundings, but I am not a patient man, YN. I warn you."

He heads out thrusting his fingers into his hair.

“What is your name?” you ask, ignoring his threats. 

“You can call me, Ray,” he says with a smile, before heading out and leaving you confused and alone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	4. Darkness

 

Saeran returned in the afternoon excited to check on you. He finished his work earlier just so he could see you. He still couldn’t believe that you, his little flower, was his. In his own personal garden. He could tend to you, help you grow, _fertilize_ you. His insides hurt, he felt a warmness, a normalness he hadn’t felt in a long time. He also felt incredibly horny…

 He didn’t really care that you would grow to hate him. As long you’re with him none of that mattered. In the pockets of his black jeans, he has your phone, set up with a special version of the messenger his twin had so meticulously created. Savior said you could stay if you were useful, and being his assistant was useful.

Teaching you programming would be a pain in the ass, but you’ll learn. You guys had all the time in the world.

He treads down the elegantly decorated halls and sees his female underling leaving your room with her black cloak imprinted with golds, utterly soaked. She immediately lowers her head when he steps in front of her. 

“How is she?”

She removes her hood to reveal her violet hair. She hides her anger as she looks down at her feet. 

“She threw her lunch all over the floor. She’s been yelling and throwing things like a crazy person.”

“I see,” he responds idly staring at the carved wooden doors as if he could see you.

There is silence now. He wonders what you’re doing. You don’t like loneliness. You hardly stayed in your tiny apartment when he followed you around. You maintained yourself busy, reading a book, going to movies, all to keep memories locked in the back of your mind. Did you know how beautiful you looked lost in thought? A strand of hair slipping from your ear as you read? 

“Mr. Ray, how long are you planning on keeping her here. She’ll be easy to manage once she is in the first stages of her cleansing.”

“Not yet.”

“Why?!” she says, immediately regretting her outburst. She is surprised that she is even standing. He would’ve slapped her across the face for even daring to question him. He hasn’t been acting normal since that woman arrived.

His mint gaze needles her into submission as she apologizes.

“You are dismissed, U786.”

Hearing her enumeration instead of her name breaks her heart, and that is more than enough punishment for her. She wished he would’ve slapped her instead. She bows her head silently and leaves. He doesn’t even look her way or notice.  

Saeran unlocks the door, and a smirk lifts the corner of his lips. You are sprawled on the ground on your side. You wear a skirt under a long cardigan. You watch him under a veil of hair that covers your face. Behind you, is your lunch. The salmon plaster on the windows that wouldn’t break, chairs broken, the bed undone. You remind him of a child.

You don’t say anything and sit up. He looks different in his black jeans and red tunic. He wears the hoodie he wore on the night he rescued you. His mint eyes look intense, but that tired look on his face is still there. The shadow of dark circles that looks as if he had painted them there.

“You’ve been naughty I’ve heard. Why did you throw your lunch? You didn’t like it?” 

“I want to go home!’ You snap.

He squats and places a strand of hair over your shoulder. “That’s not possible. You don’t have a home anymore. I canceled your contract at your apartment. In fact, I have erased you completely from all databases. You can start over if you wish. New name. New birth certificate.”

Your breathing turns panting as you push off the floor. You remember your father. His kind smile. His kind eyes. The kindness that was met with betrayal. You love your name.

“You’re really are crazy,” you turn to face the window. You see a garden at a distance. You turn around to face him. His hands in his pockets watching you with interest as he had done for god knows how long. “You say we have a lot in common. I kept thinking what you mean by that. You must have someone that betrayed you too, right?” He doesn’t answer, but as close as he is you can see his temples tic. You see the tightness of those evenly full lips, and your heart sinks for him. “You don’t have to tell me. I understand too well, but despite everything, we must keep living, Ray. I can’t stay here. You can’t keep me trapped in here.” 

“You want to leave even though you don’t exist in the outside anymore?” 

He looks offended. Hurt. He has tried to be kind to you, and you still don’t want him. His jaw clenches.

“Do you hate them?”

You know who them is. “No. I don’t. I can’t allow my hate to poison me. I don’t even hate that woman either.”

“You’re a liar! You are telling me that it doesn’t pain you that your mother is out there on some luxury cruise with her other children and husband, while you are completely forgotten? That is what you don’t understand.”

He grabs you tight by the wrist and forces you to look up at him. Your wrist hurts at how tight he clamps them. His gaze has gone crazed.  “You don’t understand that your lack of existence didn’t happen when I erased you. You’ve ceased to exist a long time ago. No one wants you, but me!” 

Your tears spill at his words that are like daggers to your heart.

“You’re right! But even though,” you sniffle, your chin quivers but it is prideful, pointed up at him. “B-but even though I am alone…I must try to keep living. That is what people do, Ray! They don’t pick up girls as damaged as them and keep them trapped in their homes.”

He let’s go. He gives you his back. You ache for him because you can sense the pain there. The hollowness. You take a step forward, you are overrun by the need to embrace him.

“Is that what your therapist said? You must try to keep living and miraculously erase the shit of the past?”

 No. My father.

You open your mouth to inform him, but his voice overruns yours.

“I can’t try to keep living,” he says sourly through clenched teeth. “Because the old me is dead. I am reborn again. _I am_ living.”

I _am no longer the broken little boy tied by the leg like an animal._

“But if you have moved on from your past so easily,” His fists clench until his knuckles go white. “You should be okay sleeping in the dark.”

He turns to face you, and the sinister look in his eyes lets you know exactly what he means.

Your eyes widen in fear, but all you can manage is a, “Wait.”

He walks away. Not once does he turn to face you. When he gets near the door, you run after him. 

“Please, Ray! Don’t!” 

He turns then, an unreadable look on his face. “Pitch darkness shouldn’t bother a toughie like you. You have apparently forgiven your mother. Your forgiveness will allow you to live through the night, right?” You drop to your knees and begin to sob as the door slams closed, and on cue, the lights go off.

You begin to tremble. Only sunlight shining through the window.

“No please, don’t leave me,” you mumble, laying on the floor in fetal position, “Come back.”

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> updating twice tonight :) Thanks for reading.


	5. Contact

Saeran can feel his blood simmering through his veins. He feels conflicted in hurting you, but the idea of you being insisting on leaving pisses him off so much that his heart is beating so fast, and his ears ring so much that he expects steam to gush out of them.   He almost wanted to beg you to stay. To not leave him after he finally found you.  Why don’t you understand that he wants to treasure you, and protect you? He was so excited to see you too. Being in the dark should make you come to your senses. He passes other believers, he tilts his head diplomatically and goes to the one place he always feels safe: his development room. His computers that are programmed just the way he likes them. They do as he says, and they don’t hurt him. He is afraid by what he feels for you.

When he finally arrives, he closes the door and leans against it. In the silence, he allows himself to breathe. He tries to erase the images of your fearful face when he told you he’d keep you in the dark. That is your punishment. He can’t allow himself to get soft no matter how much he likes you. He was a selective sadist, he only enjoyed inflicting pain in those that deserve it, and you, although you piss him off, don’t deserve this. You don’t deserve someone as awful as he either…but you’re his. It is what it is. 

When he finally recovers from his anger. He goes to his desk. Puts on some headphones and plays the loudest alternative he can find so he can drown the imaginary screams he hears coming out of you when he imagines you in that room all alone and in the dark.

You try so hard to breathe when the last rays of sunlight disappear. You are under the windowsill, sitting in the bit of light the moon provides. You are shaking. It is in the dark where terrible things happen. It was in the darkness that _he_ would come to find you. Where _he_ would come to hurt you.

“I won’t forgive you,” you mutter into your knees that you crush against your chest. “I won’t forgive you, Ray. I thought you said you were going to protect me.”

You don’t know how long you are there, your body quakes violently, but just as you think you can’t handle another minute, the doors open. The light from the hall pours in, and it illuminates him as if he was an angel from heaven. You are so happy to see him that you jump and run to him.

You embrace him tightly catching him off guard. “Oh, Ray, you came back! You came back for me.” He gasps at seeing how red your eyes are after so much crying. You clutch at his shirt; your forehead pressed just underneath his pecs. “You’re wrong, you know,” you look up at him with tears still running down your cheeks. “I haven’t forgiven that woman. I hate her so much that I can’t stand it. I hate her so much that it scares me, Ray. It scares so much because I want to have her in front of me and destroy her with my own two hands.” 

Saeran’s arms tighten around you, and he leans down to take your lips. His kiss is gentle, he can taste the tears, and the contact shatters through him like a thousand needles. You are shocked at first, but whether it is your relief, your fear to not be left alone, you return the kiss. He decides he doesn’t care what it is that is making you touch him. He is just happy that you are doing it! That you are receiving him! That meant that you could learn to love him. That you would stay.

Your contact is incredible. Your hands curl on his back as he takes you further into the dark room. He tastes you with his tongue; his hips press against you as he his need builds, his cock stirring with want.  He wants to devour you and take you right here. He pulls back with a pant. 

“We need to stop, or I won’t be responsible for what happens after,” he whispers breathlessly rubbing his thumb over your lips. “I want our first time to be extra special.”

You continue to hold him close. He digs through his phone and with a beep the lights turn back on. You look up at him, your face pulsing after that passionate kiss. You have no idea how you allowed yourself to be taken back by it, but what most surprised you was the tingling between your legs.

There is a knock at the door that immediately yanks you away and throws you back to reality.

“Dinner, girl,” Violet says as she enters. When she walks in with the tray, you are seated on the floor in front of the coffee table as Saeran bites down on the corner of his bottom lip still tasting you on his lips. The soft imprints still warm on the skin, your tiny little whimpers still in his ears. “Mr. Ray, I hope I wasn’t interrupting.

“No, go ahead and set the tray down.”

When the dinner is placed on the coffee table, you realize that you weren’t in the dark for too long. It’s scary how fears make everything feel like an eternity.

Violet stops and stares at her boss wanting to say something, but she bites her tongue and bows leaving you too alone. Saeran waits until the doors settle in place and then sits across from you. 

“I am sure you are tired of being in this room.”

Your stomach growls, and you stare at your roasted dinner with hunger. “Yes, when can I go out?”

“Soon,” he says with a smile. He digs through his jacket and takes out your phone. He hands it to you and just as you reach it, he pulls it away. “I just need your help with something first.”

You shovel veggies into your mouth and arch your brows confusedly. 

“Everyone has to earn their keep here. You will earn yours by assisting me.”

“Just what is this place, Ray?” You ask. You grab the napkin and dab your mouth, folding it, and then patting your stinging eyes. “What is it you do here?” 

“This place is a place of peace and happiness. We are all family here.”

“Like a church?” You ask, sniffling and cutting a thin slice of roast. 

“Something like that,” he says with a yawn. “I’ll tell you more with due time.”

“Okay,” you say, not wanting to make him angry. “What is it you need me to do.” 

If he takes you outside, the easier it will be to plan an escape. You have to try. You have to try to return to the normal world before you are consumed by this darkness and sexual tension that is palpable whenever he is around you. 

 _No matter what, YN, you have to keep on living…_  

He hands you back your phone. Your settings are all reset. He observes you and leans back on his palms. 

“So, I do a little bit of app developing.” He stands up and sits next to you, looming over you,  shoulder to shoulder. You hate how aware of his presence you are. He points at the squared application that looks like a little agenda. “This application is linked with an association called R.F.A, and since you’re going to be my assistant. I need your help in uncovering secrets. These are things that I can't do because of my lack of time.”

“What type of secrets?”

“Anything,” he says leaning on your shoulder. “Anything suspicious that guy V says or asks you, anything that talks about donor lists for the party, location, names, addresses, anything that mentions a woman named Rika. You take a screenshot of whatever you think it's important and it will automatically be sent to my email.”

“Are we harming these people?” You ask quietly looking over at him. He straightens and smiles, placing a kiss on your temple. "You are too kind. Don't forget that they harmed me first. I need you to get my revenge on those hypocrites. Especially _him_.”

His anger just under the surface made your flesh goosebump.

“Then this hollowness will disappear, and you and I can live happily here forever.”

You gulp. Saeran forces your phone on the coffee table and turns you until he can capture your lips once more. This time his kiss is rough, demanding as if he wanted to erase the bitter aftertaste of his painful past. You keep thinking about ways of escape, but you can't help kissing him back, sucking on his tongue, tasting all his anger, his sadness. He is right. Both of you are so much alike. 

The more he nips, sucks, and ravishes your lips with urgency, the more you feel how his desperate affections also beg you to stay. You wonder if you will be able to escape this man that has been following you for so long. You wonder who this R.F.A is when he kisses your jaw and growls deep in his throat. You wonder what they did to this broken man, whose lips are so soft, who's breathing increases when he pushes you back to the floor and gets on top you, only to restrain himself and say that you still weren't ready. 

You swallow thickly wanting to throw everything away and beg him to have you. To love you. To let him know that he is the only man that has ever touched you and didn't make you think about the disgusting acts of the past. 

You find yourself slowly losing control of your body, your thoughts, and who you once were.

And that is why you have to escape... before this platinum haired man traps you in his world forever...

 


	6. Saeran's Garden

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the kudos! Saeran/Ray will not have a split personality in this fic. That's all I can say. I don't want to spoil anything. He does have a dark side and soft side, but they are all him, not two different entities. 
> 
> The smut is coming next, hehe, isn't it much more enjoyable when there is build up? :D

 

**_YN: Help me!_ **

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**_ Error 404 that combination of words is not allowed _ **

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**_YN: Help…me…please…_ **

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**_ Error 404 that combination of words is not allowed _ **

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**_YN: Help_ **

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**_ Error 404 that word is not allowed _ **

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**_YN: Rescue_ **

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**_ Error 404 that word Is not allowed _ **

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**_YN: S.O.S_ **

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**_ Error 404 that word Is not allowed _ **

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**_YN: Hi End Lost Place_ **

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**Seven: Hi end lost place?**

 

**YN: Read the first---**

 

* * *

 

The screen turns red, and numerations begin to appear. Your phone that only works with this app has frozen. You scream out in frustration and throw yourself back in the bed. These RFA people look innocent enough. Even If it’s suspicious that the lead, V, accepted you so easily there is nothing that tells you they are dangerous even if they are still wary of you.

You slap your hands over your ears as the screen still beeps. Ray has been gone a week now. On business, his underling said, who stopped feeding you and threatens you whenever she has the chance. It doesn’t matter you’re not hungry anymore.  You can easily tell how jealous she is of you. Being alone gives you the time to think about your father and his kindness. It’s suffocating here. You feel like your life has gone into a standstill. You think about the email your boss at the shelter sent after “you” told her that you were going overseas.

_Can you recommend someone to fill your place?_

Your stomach hurts at how easily you are replaced. No one wants you. Not anymore. Not since your father died. What does Ray want from you? Why does he want you?

The doors open and you are sure it’s Violet.

“If you’re not going to feed me fine, but stop bothering me!”

“Hmm?” Ray asks walking towards you. “She hasn’t fed you?” he asks between clenched teeth.

You sit up. You hate how happy you are to see him, you try to mask it, but the way his eyes glint tells you he noticed.  He looks extra tired as if he didn’t get any sleep. 

You mumble not wanting to be a snitch. You feel sorry for her for some reason. Your silence gives him the answer as he twirls on his booted feet and heads out without much of a word.

You stand up and notice your phone has quieted down. You smooth your hair and your navy dress and walk towards the door.

“You disobeyed me, Violet,” his voice sounds calm, icy, and that malice swiftly turns into anxiety. “You want her to hate me is that it? If she abandons me if she leaves it will because of  _you_.” He can’t have you leave. Just the thought twists his insides. You were his. He has followed you all this time. You won’t leave. He'll kill..no, no, he shouldn't think that way.  He makes a frustrating sound that comes out as a growl. “That is not how we treat our guest.”

She doesn’t say anything, but the reverberating of skin contacting against skin makes you panic. Just as you rush to the doors,  it is thrust open making you stumble back.

He smiles at you with those smiles that are so difficult to decipher. 

“YN,” he says gently.  “Violet has something to say to you.”

Violet steps forward and smiles at you as if nothing happened despite that her cheek is blotched red. “I am sorry, YN. I behaved unhospitable, and I accept my punishment for my wrongdoing.”

Your lips move to say something, but you are too shocked for words. Before you find them, she lowers her head and turns, leaving you shaken. She will hate you for sure more than she does already.

“You hit her,” you mumble once the doors close.

“I punished her for you,” he says coming close to you. “She’ll bring your lunch. Poor girl. You must be starving.”

“Get away from me,” you snap. “You’ll hit me too when I piss you off is that it?” It’s odd knowing that behind the surface stands a darkness that is tangible. His words always so deceivingly kind make you forget that this man can hurt you if he wanted. “Exactly who are you? What do you want from me?” 

He doesn’t answer, but your expression filled with confusion and threads of fear bother him. He doesn’t want to keep you by his side with something as moldable as fear. He doesn’t want you to fear him. He doesn’t want you to hate him either. He wants the one thing he never had...

 “I want you to stay with me. I want you to be my companion. I want you to be mine.” He glances over his shoulder as he passes by you, “Truly mine.”

  
He goes to bed, sits, and grabs your phone with a sigh, “About hitting you…I don’t know. I don’t want to, and if I ever lash out of anger, please forgive me. I try to be kind. I don’t want to let my fury get the best of me.”

What he doesn’t tell you is that he got out of isolation too early. When he takes the elixir, he gives himself a week for the contents to get out of his system. It is the elixir that gives him the courage to torture those that threaten Mint Eye; it feeds the anger and darkness already alive inside him. It makes him more impulsive, irritable. He fights the urge to grab you, rip your clothes and take you. He got out a day early because of the messages you were sending. 

“Help?” he repeats what you typed scrolling through your phone. “I thought you had finally made your decision to stay.” 

“I haven’t decided anything,” you say trying to process his previous words. 

“Maybe…” he starts fingering the edge of the phone. “Maybe I should just keep you in the dark and see if you change your mind.

Your lip quivers and he bites his lip. Instantly regretting what he said to you. He stands so quickly and rushes to you. Before you know it, he embraces you. He holds you tight and places his chin on your shoulder.

“I am sorry. I am sorry. I won’t use your fear against you again. It was an impulsive response, but I will keep you locked in here if you keep trying to escape.”

Violet interrupts with your dinner tray, and you jump in his embrace, but he doesn’t let go. You look away from Violet’s sizzling stare, and when she stays too long, he is quick to send her away. He doesn’t move, and you feel like you are holding your breath as his breathing turns shallow. 

“I want you to love me. That is what I want from you.” Your eyes turn full, and then he cups your face, “but you don’t have to love me. Not leaving is enough for me. I’ve been alone here for so long that I am willing to be satisfied with so little.”

The pain in his tired eyes makes your heart wrench. He says this place is full of happiness and peace, but happiness and peace for everyone except him? 

Just the thought of him being alone makes your eyes water. You care for this man that you don’t even know, and you must be as crazy as him. But you know that is not craziness that draws you to him... 

It’s the familiarity of his touch, the way he simply claims your lips and kisses them as if he had done so a million times before. 

“The screenshots you’ve sent me have been of so much help, YN, and because of that, I want to thank you by taking you out. Let’s go to the garden.”

He kisses your lips so softly that it makes you gasp for air.

“I am so excited to share it with you. You will love it, but you have to eat first.”

The boyish gleam on his face makes you even more confused. Wasn’t this the same man that had just slapped Violet?

 

* * *

 

 

“Can I take off my blindfold?”

“Yes,” he says as you slide the black material off your eyes and throw atop a small table.  

As soon as your eyes adjust to the sun, you are amazed by all the flowers surrounding you. The garden is large with tall hedges that encase the garden with a living wall. He walks to a rosebush and smiles, a smile filled with fondness. “This rosebush had to be cut down twice because it just wouldn’t sprout and look how lovely my orange roses are now.”

You don’t say anything, watching him, amazed by how he stands out in this garden with his red tunic, leather jacket, and a choker around his pale neck. He is like a fallen angel in heaven. He caresses the petals so softly with long white fingers.

“You’ve grown these all yourself?”

He looks towards you spearing his fingers through his platinum hair. “Yes. Gardening is a hobby of mine.”

“It’s such a strange hobby for--”

“Someone like me?” he interrupts finishing your sentence with a handsome smile. “I am not sure what you mean with that, but I guess you’re right. When I was young, there was a garden outside my window right across the street. I couldn’t go out, you see. My mother was a monster like yours, but at least yours left you with your father. Mine never wanted me, but she didn’t want to get rid of me either. She enjoyed torturing us.” 

“Us?”

He doesn’t acknowledge your response and continues with that distant pensive look that softens his tired face. 

“Whenever I saw the garden out my window I’d pretend that I was the one who tended it and watered it. It was such a treat whenever I got see it, but the man whose garden it belonged too stopped caring for it, and it withered." He pauses his jaw clenching. "Everything I have ever loved and cherished has withered like that garden.  _Everything_.” 

He turns to you, his mint colored gaze intense. 

“Were you captive?” 

“I was for a very long time. Imagine a lonely boy whose only joy was gazing at a garden across a street. Quite pathetic, huh?”

You don’t even know tears have fallen until you see his creased brow. He walks to you unsure if those glittering streams that fall down those (skin tone) cheeks are real. He feels them with the pad of his index finger.

“You’re crying? Do you hate being here with me that much?” His temples tic, not knowing how to react to your tears.

“I-I at least had father,” you say between sobs, wiping your nose with the back of your hand. Maybe being in that room for so long has made you emotional or maybe you do feel agony for this man.  The man that has plucked you from your world and planted you somewhere else entirely. A place where you can’t escape. You no longer exist outside  _his_ garden. “You didn’t have anyone?”

You meet his eyes to find that surprised look still on his face, and then he chuckles afraid of the care in your voice. “You’re really are amazing, YN. Crying for me.” 

He lowers and kisses your wet eyes. “I knew you were the one for me. There is a gift that I was debating in showing you, but I feel more confident now that I know you care for me.  Come with me.”

He goes to the Victorian style outside table and grabs the blindfold. He gently wraps it around you, stroking away hairs. 

“You look so cute in this dress and blindfolded like this even more,” he whispers into your ear before taking your wrist and guiding you inside.

* * *

 

You don’t know how long you walk, but you hear unfamiliar voices that greet him here and there. He takes you into his development room unable to hide the smile that splits his face. You cried for him! No one other than his savior had cried for him. You are the one for him. He knew it! He knew it!

He guides you deeper into the room that makes you shiver instantaneously. He takes off his leather jacket and places it on you. It smells like him. A light cologne and a scent that is naturally his. It’s so surprisingly sweet.

“Don’t take off the blindfold until I tell you, okay? I have to prepare it.”

“Okay,” you respond, your heart is beating so fast, but it’s not because you’re afraid although you feel you should be.

You hear the sound of typing and then humming of computers.

“Take it off now,” he says excitedly. “Before you miss the good part.

You do as he says sliding the blindfold up to the crown of your head. You focus on the tattoo that decorates his pale upper arm. You want to look closer, but the screen grabs your attention. At first, you don’t understand, but you look past his enthusiastic face up to a dozen computer screens that show the face of your mother on the news. A mother you can hardly recognize because of the countless surgeries and elegant clothes that decorate her body. She is crying. Her children are crying as she tries to run after her husband that is being escorted by police. 

_Rhee Industry is in hot water after it has been discovered that it has ties to Korean mafia and illegal weapon distribution. As of now, Rhee Dojung has been placed under arrest, and the hard drive of his computer seized. This has come as quite a shock. What is more interesting is that the same day the Rhee family’s illegal activities came to light, the brother of Hope Rhee, was found murdered in his cell. He was charged for---_

_Click._

“I destroyed them for you,” Saeran says staring at you proudly.

He awaits recognition for his efforts, but you can’t say a word. Tears fill your eyes again.

_You mustn’t hate your mother, YN. Hate will only weigh you down. No matter what happens in the future as long as you keep living, as long as you don’t allow hate to consume you, you will survive--without your mother, even without me._

_Daddy, don’t say that! I need you by my side._

“What’s wrong?” Saeran interrupts your thoughts. “Aren’t you happy? I destroyed your mother for you so you wouldn’t sully your hands with someone as disgusting as her. You don’t have to dirty your beautiful hands. I can do that all for you from now on. Whoever you want gone... I’ll make them disappear just for you.” 

Is this the same man who got excited about showing you his garden? 

You drop to your knees and hide your face in your palms and begin to bawl. You thought of destroying her so many times, you’ve dreamt of it, tasted it, but now that it has happened you don’t feel the joy you imagined you’d feel. All you feel is empty.

Saeran frowns stepping towards you and squatting until he is in front of you. He pulls you in his arms, and you allow him to embrace you. You are too broken to pull away. He rubs his hand down your back as your body continues to wrack with sobs.

“Are you sad because you didn’t do it yourself? It’s best this way. You can't do what I can. It is my job to protect you from now on.” 

“Why-why me? Why did you choose me? W-why did you take me away from my world?"

“I took you because it has to be you. No one else."

“Take me back, please. Just take me back.”

Saeran continues to hold you and buries his nose in your hair. “You’re never going back. Your place is by my side.”

 

 

****

 

 


	7. Firsts

You open your eyes in a dim room with a breathless gasp. Your eyes are puffy, and they sting with each blink. You must’ve passed out. Your emotions immediately flood you, and you remember the face of the woman that had abandoned you so long ago. How different she looked now, you hardly remembered what she looked like; you were so little when she left.  It was odd how you could see yourself in her children, too. You sit up and try to swallow the lump in your throat. You feel strange. You feel terrible for what has happened to her, but at the same time, you feel special for what Ray did. You hadn’t felt protected since your father died and here was this man that you didn't know existed telling you that he would destroy whomever you wanted.

 

It is my job to protect you from now on.

 

Your heart flutters remembering the resolution on his face. That darkness just underneath the surface in a soft boil. The emotion swirling in the intensity of his eyes.

 

“Mmm,” Saeran mumbles beside you, and immediately you turn his direction.

 

Your heart thumps in your temples as you realize who is sharing your bed. You were so lost in thought that you hadn’t noticed his presence. You grope over your body and sigh with relief to know you are still dressed.

 

“Ray?” You question shifting slightly. He is fast asleep, on his side, his back to you. He groans again, this time more painfully, and turns until he is face up.

 

“P-please…don’t leave,” Saeran breathes heavily, his forehead beading with sweat.

 

Your heart seizes as his face contorts in what you are sure is a nightmare. You get them too. You know how tormenting it is to relive the painful instances of your life. You reach towards him, and just as your fingers make contact with his arm to shake him awake, he speaks again.

 

“Saeyoung, wh…at…d... did…I do?”

 

“Wake up,” you plead panicking, shaking his arm. “It’s a nightmare, Ray. Wake up.”

 

You get on your knees and continue to shake him, but he doesn’t move. His terror intensifies as his chest heaves.

 

“W... hy…d... did you abandon...me...Sae…Young…”

 

The impenetrable sadness of his words makes your heart wrench as you discover that you and Ray were truly the same. You both were abandoned, and from the looks of it, both of you have been betrayed, but you at least had your father…he had no one.

 

He had no one.

 

 Your tears fall for him again, and you place your head against his chest hearing the drumming of his heart. You hold him there, and you ride his nightmare with him knowing well that you are caring too much, that you are feeling too much for him, and that you have to leave before you are convinced to stay…

 

“Wake up, please,” you beg, caressing the stretch of his shoulders, the side of his face. “It’s alright. You are fine.”

 

You feel him calm in your embrace, and the sucking of his teeth informs you he is awake. You immediately sit up to find golden eyes greeting you sleepily. He looks away slightly embarrassed and annoyed. But you don't see that because you focus on how lovely his actual eye color is.

 

“Y-you were having a nightmare,” you tell him, he notices the concern in your face. “Y-you were calling for someone.”

 

His jaw clenches turning away; he is afraid that you’ll see the vulnerability that overcomes him when he remembers Saeyoung.

 

“I can’t be free of that piece of trash even in my sleep.” His voice sounds deeper, huskier. “That trash is in the R.F.A, YN. He betrayed me. That is why I need your help. I can’t destroy him as easily as I destroyed your mother and uncle.”

 

There is a long stretch of silence that neither makes an effort to break. You are consumed by him; you are consumed by the odd need to protect him. Why? Why do you feel as you’ve known him forever?

 

You meet eyes again and shift closer to him.

 

“You pity me?” he asks, too prideful to enjoy the sad way you look at him, and secretly wishing that your pity makes you stay. He clenches his fists waiting for your answer.

 

“No, I don’t pity you, Ray,” You say and your body moves without your control when you lower to kiss his lips.

 

 They part in surprise and you swallow the sharp inhale he takes when you taste from the inside. Your tongue wets his dry lips and slides against his. You don’t want to tell him that what you feel is nothing close to pity, but the instinctual need to defend him. To fight with him against this Saeyoung, the rest of the R.F.A and the world.

 

You don’t tell him that as you plant butterfly kisses on his jaw and your fingers curl on his lean chest, that you want to explore this fire that has awaken since you met him. You don’t tell him that you want to find out the reason your emotions react so easily to him. Would your body react the same way? You deepen the kiss as he receives you openly, allowing you to explore him more eagerly. A quiver of excitement runs through your body wanting more of him. To explore much, much more.

 

He groans when you leave his mouth to kiss down his chin. You feel the thick swallow traveling his throat against your lips. His Adam’s Apple moves against your tongue while you paint it like a canvas, tasting his clean sweat. Your body hums with desire, and the more you touch him, the more you want more of him. You shake at the urgency that guides your movements, it was as if you were truly meant for this man only.

 

He remains still, afraid that if he says something or does something at all, you will stop. Your touch soothes him and makes him forget about everything. Even Saeyoung…

 

 His cock jolts in response when your hand roams his hips and squeezes gently over the crotch of his pants. He props up on his elbows and watches you in dazed silence as you sit up on your knees and begin to undo them, the hardness you can feel against the side of your palm gives you peek of what he is hiding under his clothes. You look at him and are breathless at the beauty of those golden eyes, the desire swirling in them urging you on. He breathes heavily, and his mouth is deliciously parted showing you what your actions do to him. When you finally take his throbbing cock into your hand, he throws his head back with your name hanging on his lips.

 

He is so warm like velvet steel in your shaky hand. You caress the soft and hard flesh with your fingers gently, the tips of your fingers skirting over the bulbous head, swirling at the tip tracing the ridge right underneath. Your gentle explorations make him thrust into your hand. A possessive wave fights him for control. Your hand is excruciatingly teasing. A slow smile appears on your face when you gather the impatience on his features. You continue to hold his cock straight while you lift to straddle him.

 

“You’re a virgin, right?” You ask. You become aware of how throaty your voice has become. How wet you are for him that your wetness slides down your thighs.

 

“Yes. You’re my first, my last,” he grunts, his voice is low and aroused like yours.

 

His words make you bite down on your lip. You want that to be true. You want this man so much that it scares you.  You pull your panties to the side and slowly guide him inside your sopping entrance. He instantly grips your hips as a powerful wave of pleasure jolts through him. You guide him deeper inside you.  Softly the thick member spreads and stretches you with a sensation of fullness.  Saeran stills every muscle on his body to keep from nailing into you with one stroke. He loves your flushed face as you fill yourself with him patiently until every single inch of his length is embraced by your tight sheath. You throw your head back frozen in the satisfying pleasure of penetration. Your long hair cascading on his lap.

 

Saeran groans in the tightness of your body and the milking of your inner muscles that drive him insane. He sits up, his large hands molding to your hips. He begins to move under you, burying himself even deeper rising your hips and impaling you over and over. A gasping moan escapes your lips making you collapse on his shoulder, your arms wrap tightly around his neck while you both ride each other in pace that increases in disparity.

 

“I-I am a virgin too,” you mumble hollowly. His fingers bite impatiently on your hips taking control of the rhythm. Your buttocks tighten as you try to meet his strokes.

 

“I know,” he breathes heavily with each slam of his hips. “I know.”

 

His orgasm is so close. He can taste it. He can feel it coiling deep inside him, he can feel it inside you, too. He wants to experience a finish not given by his own hand. He wants to cum with you. Inside you…

 

You don’t tell him that you were unable to be intimate with your past boyfriends without thinking of your past. You don’t tell him that his touch doesn’t make you feel disgusting or afraid. That he is the first that makes you feel like a woman, the first that washes away any filth left inside you.

 

“You're mine, aren’t you?” he growls into your neck as he squeezes your ass and pumps faster into you. You fit him like a glove and you fit him so well because you were always meant for him. You lock your ankles on his back and allow him to move you to his heart’s delight. Your breasts bounce on his chest reminding him of their presence. He leans you back on his arms until he can take a nipple into his mouth over your dress. “Mine,” he murmurs possessively, each stroke reaching the edge of combustion with you. Saeran is so happy that he could die, right here, buried in all the warmth you give him.

 

“I must be, I must be,” you moan throatily, his words invading your thoughts just as your orgasm uncoils. You scream into the base of his neck, holding him so tight that you don’t know how he can still breathe. His teeth gnash together, in pleasure this time, while he continues to drive into you. Your walls clench and milk him until he can take no more. He thrusts one more time and comes unannounced with a hoarse cry, crushing you to him, jerking hard. His warmth spills into the depths of your womb, when another orgasm crashes into you and curls your toes, leaving you both panting and holding each other in the dimmed darkness.

* * *

 

The escape you both share collapses swiftly as Violet pounds on the door.

 

“Mr. Ray!”

 

“Let me be,” he roars, already hardening again and wanting to continue to drown in this physical pleasure he had never had the chance to experience. He holds you tight and swings you until you are back first on the bed. You are pinned under his lean body, in his mercy. Just as he is about to take off his shirt, Violet interrupts again with another knock.

 

“It’s Savior. It’s an emergency.”

 

Saeran freezes and looks at you. You are so beautiful. Your hair spread on the bed, your face flushed red. Your breasts rise with your rapid breathing.  Your legs are wide open for him. He can see that with the knock of reality, regret is beginning to crawl in the face that just instances ago was stuck in a pleasured stupor. He doesn’t know that the regret is because you know you are losing…that you are falling deeper into his world. Whether you regret it or not, Ray is happy and thankful that you gave him a sweet taste of what escape feels like. An instant without pain or anger.

 

“Ray,” you whisper.

 

He hates that name on your lips. He wants you to love the him that was born into this world. To love all of him. His darkness his kindness. To want and love Saeran only…not the name he had made up to disassociate with everything in his past like the contacts that cover the eyes that are so similar to the man he hates

 

He pulls out of you and doesn’t say a word when he heads out. You feel empty; you feel cold. Was he satisfied? Now that he took what he wanted was he done with you?

 

You sit up wanting to call out to him and ask him, but you stop yourself. He looks so distant as if a wall was just erected between you. A wall that was broken when you both were connected.

 

When the door closes behind him, you are shaking in your foolishness. Maybe he is just like every other man wanting to get their fill and leaving once they have sucked you dry…but you hadn’t given them what you just gave Ray...

 

 

 

“What is it?” Saeran asks Violet irritatingly while he buckles his pants. Her eyes widen under her hood and fury makes her clench her fists.

 

He walks down the hall in front of her sliding his fingers through his hair feeling cold. He was already missing you. The regret on your face makes him even more irritated. What if you deny your body to him after that? You couldn’t do that after you have given him a taste of something so good. He decides that as much as he cares for you…he will continue to take you even if you change your mind. He has a right to every inch you. If his ears didn’t fool him, you said you were his. You admitted it.

 

“Mr. Ray,” Violet says for the second time. Her voice cracking in the verge of furious tears. He turns to her and she looks down at her feet to keep him from noticing. He doesn’t like it when they meet eyes with him when they are in their golden state.

 

 “You are being sent out on a mission.  Mint Eye’s secure data was breached by a group of amateur hackers. You are being sent to teach them a lesson along with a group of corrupted.”

 

“Understood,” He answers. “Ready my Elixir and my contacts.”

 

“Already ready, Mr. Ray. They are in your room.”

 

He nods heading towards Savior’s throne room. Violet glares at his back, but it is you she sees. He will be gone a couple of days, and she will use that time to get rid of you…


	8. Deception

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drama!! ~_~ Thanks for all the sweet comments. I promise this angst will be worth it!

 

You wait for him. Even if you tell yourself that you’re not, you wait for him. You grab the phone and try to see if he has texted you. His number and his calls are the only ones that go through your phone, but your phone is completely silent. By now you have more than ten messages telling you to be good, to behave, and that he looks forward to seeing you. The silence of your phone feeds the insecurity that Ray won’t look at you the same after what you both did. 

You can’t sleep thinking about the warmth of his arms. You still feel the impressions of them wrapped around your hips. You can still smell him on your skin even after you bathed. You can still feel his warmth deep inside you. You know you were foolish. He came inside you…

 You should be worried, and in any other circumstances you would be, but your life is not normal anymore. You find yourself doing and feelings things the you, before Ray, would never do. You make a note in your mind that if it happens again, he has to wear protection. A baby is the last thing you need.

You enter the RFA app. They question you about your sudden disappearance earlier. You explain the best you can, but as you chat with 707, Luciel, there is something about his appearance that looks similar to Ray. Those gorgeous golden eyes for example. Your mind races with speculation especially considering the nightmare Ray had. Saeyoung, he called. Could it be that 707 is Saeyoung? And if he is, why did he betray him? You believe Ray’s words wholeheartedly because the pain when he spoke of this RFA couldn't be faked. There is resentment and sadness embedded there. They did something horrible to him. Of that, you can be sure. That ache you feel when you think of him is familiar to you now. Asking for help to this people seems pointless, but it is easy to talk to them. 

Everyone heads out to sleep, leaving you alone in the chatroom until V gets in. 

 

**YN: I am heading to bed. Goodnight. :)**

**V: Wait, please.**

**YN: ?**

**V: Can we talk?**

You roll over in bed. The little lamp that is always on lighting the top of your head.

 

**YN: Sure. Are you okay?**

**V: I am fine. I don’t wish to worry you. Since all the members are asleep, I feel strange leaving without at least talking to someone.**

**YN:  :)** **It’s fine. I don’t mind the company. I am alone right now.**

 

**V: Oh? I believe you mentioned you are rooming with someone. Is it here in the city?**

 

You know he is trying to get information out of you. They are curious about where you come from, but it is V that makes you so suspicious. He accepts you without knowing who you are. He trusts in you by mentioning only one name: Rika. 

 

**YN: I honestly not sure where I am, but I am certain it’s not in the city.**

 

**V: Could you tell me where---**

 

ERROR; THE CHAT HAS AUTOMATICALLY RESTARTED

 

_V has entered the chatroom_

_  
YN has entered the chatroom_

 

**V: Oops. It looks like your version of the messenger has a lot of rules. Haha.**

**YN: Why do you trust me? Why do you allow me to chat with you despite red flags?**

**V: Are there red flags? –Confused emoticon- I trust you because I believe you are good person.**

**YN: …**

**V: You doubt it?**

**YN: Can you get on your internet?**

**V: I believe so.**

**YN: Can you google Hope Rhee, please.**

**V:  Okay. Sure.**

The memories of your mother are so distant that she is just a hazy blob of your childhood.  Your father loved her so much that he refused to throw any of her clothes or any photos of her. Sometimes he would talk about her as if she was just on some cruise.  You believe it was because he secretly thought that one day she would return to him. But even when your father died, your mother never showed up. Your uncle believed that the funeral plot was paid by her even though the funeral home said it was an anonyms donor. You’ve never forgiven her and you never will. 

 

**V: Okay. It seems they have seized all her accounts. They are investigating her to see if she knew anything about her husband’s illegal activities.**

 

**YN: What about her children?**

**V: They are safe.**

 

“Good,” you whisper to yourself.

 

 Children are never at fault. The thought passes your mind with Ray’s words echoing inside.  The descriptions of the way he grew up chill you to the very core. His innocence completely taken away from him makes you seethe in his behalf.  You wonder if he would feel peace once he had his revenge. You don’t feel any. Even knowing that your uncle is dead and that your mother is bankrupt…you don’t feel any peace because your uncle's death didn’t fix anything.

 

**V: If it’s okay to ask, why did you want me to look her up?**

**YN: She’s my mother.**

You bite down on your lip until it stings. You are saying too much, but it is too late to take it back.

 

**V: What?**

**YN: Yes, but it’s not what you think. She is my mother in name only. She abandoned me a long time ago….**

**V: I am sorry. I had a mother that I loved so much. I can’t imagine what it must feel like.**

**YN: I am going to sleep. Good night, V.**

_YN has left the chatroom_

 

**V: I am sorry if I overstepped my boundaries. Everything will be alright, YN. Trust me.**

_V has left the chatroom_

You wipe the tears that have been irritatingly frequent since arriving here. You sit up in bed and block all the memories of your past. You focus instead on Ray and wonder if he will come to say goodnight. He usually does, bringing some sweet dessert or a flower that you know now are from his garden. But why would he come when he already got what he wanted? 

You fist the blankets and erase your insecurities. You hear the door creak open, and your heart skips a beat. You throw yourself on the bed making your cellphone bounce. You close your eyes waiting to hear his voice, but instead, you hear the cold voice of Violet.

“I know you’re not sleeping you harlot,” She snaps, turning the lights on. Their glare makes you squint as you sit up, her heavy steps resounding in your ears. 

“Get out of here! What do you want?” You say, pulling up the collar of your negligee to cover your breasts more. “I don’t want to fight with you.” 

She stops at the end of your bed and digs through the deep pockets of her black cloak. Her violet bangs, rounded above her eyebrows, shadow those eyes that shimmer with intense disgust. A slow evil smile creeps at the corner of her lips when she throws a packet at you that you grab absentmindedly.

“We won’t have to fight ever again,” She sneers taking in the shock of your face as you see the emergency contraception pill. You look at her with lips trembling. “That’s right. Mr. Ray told me how you threw yourself at him. Without protection, no less. I thought you were an idiot, but now I believe so even more. I knew you were trash.” 

“No,” you mumble, your mind racing. No. He didn’t tell her. What you both shared was special. Intimate. You remember the way he looked at you with those sleepy golden eyes, the way he held you in his arms, the hunger on his face when he pinned you on the bed. It can’t be true. Could it be that he also used you?

_It is my job to protect you from now on._

_It has to be you_

All those words said in that deep, gentle voice. You reach for your phone to call him when Violet rushes at you and yanks it from your hands just as your tears slip. 

“You’re so pathetic don’t tell me you have fallen for him already. He doesn’t want to see you.”

She smashes the phone on the wall. You stand up and face her, your anger burning your face.

“You’re a liar. I want to see him. I want him to tell me to my face that he doesn’t want me here.” 

Violet is taken back by the instant defiance. She knows that what she is doing could potentially get her killed…yet she keeps going because the only person Mr. Ray should be with is her. Not you. Not this girl that came out of nowhere.

“He isn’t here. He went on an errand he assigned me to take care of you.”

“He didn’t,” you snivel, your hands clenched to your sides. “He knows I don’t like you.”

“Well, how did I know you both had sex unless he told me?”

She sees you falter. “He is letting you go back home. He’ll let you sleep tonight, and he will meet you before you go. That is all the orders I have received.” 

“He’ll see me?”

“Yes,” Violet responds with new confidence. “Mr. Ray will be there to say goodbye.”

But that is a lie she has just made up. She hates you. She is disgusted by you.  She is going to make you regret standing up to her and ever putting hands on Ray. When he returns, she’ll say you escaped because the truth is after you are through with what she has planned for you, you will beg for escape. 

The tiny bit of hope that she is making all of this up slowly dies. Ray lied to you like all the people in your life have. Including your father, who once promised that your mother would one day return.

* * *

 

         Saeran hates outside jobs. If it would’ve been easier to hack from his development room, he would’ve done so, but he needs to be close to assess the buildings before he can find the vulnerabilities of their network back at Mint Eye. He always goes in person first before setting up cameras, that is why what he does always works. In case security gives trouble. 

Well... 

 He brought his corrupted just in case. He glances through the metallic net of the van to see a group of men wearing muzzles; their eyes are wild and erratic. They are in their cloaks that hide how tall and muscular they are. The corrupted are men that the elixir couldn’t save…too much of it has made them forget who they once wore. The only thing that is alive is their cruel, animalistic side. The side that only wants to inflict pain.

“We’re here boss,” Vic says calmly as he always is no matter the circumstance. The van jolts to a stop and Vic ruffles his blond hair.

 Saeran wonders how he can maintain that aura of calmness and goofiness when things can potentially get dangerous. Vic doesn’t need the elixir to break bones or kill someone though. Saeran does, and he doesn’t know which choice is truly scarier…being someone like Vic who can kill without even a flinch and a smile on his face, or continue to drink the elixir that gives him the strength and courage to kill without pity,  pushing him further to becoming one of them…a corrupted.

Saeran nods and grabs his walkie-talkie. He places it close to his lips and says, “Van 2 are you ready?”

“Yes, sir,” the device creaks back.

Saeran slides the hood of his jacket over his head and slides the half-mask over his nose. He reaches behind to get his laptop and disable any cameras. He sucks his teeth when he doesn’t feel it.

“Hey boss,” Vic asks lazily, glancing at him as Saeran gets off the van and slides the seat to the front so he can search for his laptop case. The corrupted get anxious beginning to growl and complain through their muzzles.

“Be quiet!” Saeran snaps smacking the metallic net with a fist. “Fuck where is it?" 

Vic notices that his boss ignores him, so he changes his statement to a question, “What are you looking for? Van 2 is ready.”

Saeran puts the seat back and gets back inside. “We’re going back. I can’t do shit without my laptop.”

Vic groans like a child. “It took us 6 hours to get here, boss. Just use mine. It’s 3 a.m.”

“We are leaving, Van 2,” Saeran says into the squared device, ignoring Vic. He knows that his laptop is nowhere like his own. “We will return tonight. Get some rest when we return."

When Vic finally stop complaining, and the van goes back to motion, Saeran is still pissed off. His elbow is propped on the rest on the door and his chin on his palm as they begin to merge into the highway. He hasn’t been able to get you out of his head especially when he thinks about the regret etched on your flushed face. He regrets not turning on the lights and seeing every curve of your body, tasting it, exploring it. His jeans tighten at the thought.

“It’s not like you to forget such important stuff, boss. Could it be that girl you have trapped in that room is clouding your thoughts?”

Saeran jerks his head towards him his eyes tapered. He is looking for an excuse to vent out his anger, and Vic knows this, so he simply shrugs. He also knows that he hasn’t taken enough of the elixir to make him jump his seat and knock out his teeth, so he continues poking him. 

“If you don’t want to tell me it’s fine. I mean no offense. Is she cute? Can you tell me that?”

“Yeah,” Saeran responds.

“Oh?” Vic raises an eyebrow. “I am guessing you're planning on cleansing her yourself. I wish I was still allowed to cleanse pretty girls.”

“You kept beating them senseless. You’re not suited for such job,” Saeran says with an eye roll.

 Vic smiles and laughs cheeringly, a gleam of the sadist gleaming in his green eyes. “You think you’re better than me boss, but you’re not. The elixir makes you just like me.”

“You're wrong,” Saeran says resolutely. “I don’t enjoy inflicting pain on innocent people even jacked up.” 

“Hmm,” Vic says scratching his temple with a long olive finger. “Where do you think the elixir harvests your darkness? It is already alive inside you. You just don’t want to admit it and if you keep taking that shit only your darkness will remain. Oh, and don’t forget that you have kidnapped that cute girl. That is not exactly being a model citizen, Mr. Ray.”

“Shut the fuck up, Vic,” Saeran says between clenched teeth.

He is going to talk to you when he gets home. He is going to touch that creamy skin under the light until he can engrave every part of your form, every expression, every little moan into his mind.

  

* * *

 

By 7:30 a.m. your bags are packed, and you have convinced yourself that Ray doesn’t want to see you. For what reason would he not come or try to communicate with you?

“It’s fine,” you tell yourself when Violet opens the door, and two men come and help you with your bags. You will return to your normal life before meeting him. You don’t need him. 

“Mr. Ray is waiting for you,” Violet says way too calmly as she hands you the blindfold. 

You put it on and take a deep breath. You will pretend not to be affected when you see Ray. You won’t give him the pleasure of seeing you distraught. 

Of course, you don’t know that Violet is leading you straight to the building full of corrupted.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I predict a very pissed off Saeran. I'll try my best to update tonight after I've completed all my homework. T_T


	9. Suffering

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Edited once, sorry for any mistakes-

 

“You are so restless, boss,” Vic says with a snicker driving through the quiet and woodsy backstreet towards their compound. “This chick has you drooling.” He laughs squeezing the steering wheel and then says, “Don’t forget that Mint Eye should be first than pussy, okay?”

“Shut up and keep driving,” Saeran says looking out the window and pretending that he could care less about what you are doing in that room. Are you sleeping still? You sleep better during the day than at night, so you're probably deep in slumber. He wants to cuddle into bed with you. He wants to hear your even breathing. Be there when a nightmare wakes you up.  He wants you to hold him, too. He has become addicted to your soothing embrace. The beautiful way you cry…he would continue making you ache for him as long as he could see the slight wrinkle of your nose as your tears fall without control. He hates how his stomach flops at the thought of being with you once more. He has become completely and utterly addicted to you.

He can’t wait to see you.

 

* * *

 

 You feel the cool breeze on your face, and you know you're outside. Violet is rough as she pulls you down the steps. The front of your shoes scuff, but she continues without carrying that you almost trip.

“Stop holding me so tight,” you grumble trying to pull away. “It’s not like am going to run.”

“Be quiet,” she says. “We are making Mr. Ray late.”

The sound of his name sinks your heart. You still can’t believe it that he wants you gone. He got what he wanted and now your disposable. It’s okay, you say to yourself. You can go back and live your normal life...after you give him a piece of your mind.

Violet guides you through the woods in a hurry. She has disposed of your things that you believe she has placed in the car to take you back home. Her pulse is racing with excitement and fear. You deserve this, she convinces herself when guilt begins to eat at her subconscious. You want to take Mr. Ray from her. You _touched_ him with your filthy uncleansed hands. It’s okay, though, Mr. Ray won’t get corrupted by someone like you. She can erase every mark you have made on his body with hers. She just has to let Mr. Ray believe that. He doesn’t need you. He will miss you at first, sure, but then he will forget you. Violet will make sure of that. She reaches the building separated from the main compound that looks like a small-scaled jail with barbed wire around it. Two believers stand at the front gates, guarding it.

“Stay here, girl,” she whispers harshly. “I need to unlock the door,” she continues to lie, walking towards the two believer guards.  She glances over her shoulder one last time as you attempt to reach for your blindfold. “Do not take it off!” she seethes. “The guards here will shoot you on sight.”

She stands in front of a bald believer, a lower rank than her.  “Is everything ready I492?”

“Yes,” he says looking past her at you. You stretch your arm as if trying to feel around. “She looks awfully peaceful for someone that is about to become corrupted meat.”

“Savior wants happy thoughts in her mind before her disposal,” Violet says with a smile. She then goes for you and pulls you hard by the wrist. She is smiling brightly when she says, “Mr. Ray is waiting. I492 will guide you to him.”

“I492?” you question softly. Numbers. Why is he called by a number? You are about to ask when the man grabs you by the arm.

“Come on let’s go.”

“Bye-Bye, YN,” Violet says as you enter the electronic gate into the horrible fate that awaits you.

* * *

 

You walk for a while and then enter the gray building. You hear a pinging sound, and then you are encased by air-conditioned coldness. 

“Are we almost there?” you ask with an involuntary shiver.  You can’t avoid feeling that something is not right. The man grumbles in response but doesn't say anything. You jump when you hear him call someone out. “Hey A306 I need you to do something.”

V tenses as he goes to the tall guard. He had snuck in two months ago, and still, he doesn’t know anything about the mysterious girl in the messenger. All he knows is that this place is well organized and growing with each day. V puts on a serious face, his light blue eyes covered by green contacts and his blue hair covered by a black wig.

 “My shift is over,” he answers flatly. "I am tired."

“Take this girl to the basement and then leave,” I492 says pushing you forward. You don’t see the frown on his face because he knows where that is. “Mr. Ray is waiting for her.”

V doesn’t say a word as he places a hand on the ball of your shoulder and guides you down empty halls with walls made out of solid concrete.

  _He really is here._ You think to yourself.

“Can I take my blindfold off now?” You question quietly

“No,” the voice responds flatly.  When you both are in the staircases that lead to the underground, he asks nonchalantly. “Just who are you?”

“It doesn’t matter,” you respond. “I am leaving today.”

He knows what happens in the basement. That torture chamber of those that have stood up to Rika. Men. Women. There is no leaving that place. When they get out of there, if they do, they are entirely blank, destroyed from the inside more than the outside. You are different, though.  He can sense it. He struggles internally, but he knows he has to get you out of here.

“You are in danger,” he whispers into your ear, making you tense. Just as you yank your blindfold the door that leads out of the staircase slams open. You stare in horror at I492 watches from the top of the stairs darkly.

 V digs into your shoulder as you tense in sheer horror.

 “Savior wants me to take this girl to Mr. Ray myself,” he sighs heavily with Violet's order. He smirks at you as you rip away from V who can only watch in dreadful hopelessness. “You can go, A306. I'll take care of the girl."

 _Sorry. Sorry._ V thinks unable to do anything.

You run down the stairs, and to your unluckiness, the door needs a combination to open. You are trapped here. Panic sets in as you hear the massive steps of I492 laughing rumbustiously.

“I wish you would’ve left your blindfold on. It would’ve given you some momentary peace.”

You turn around and look up at him pleadingly, “Please.”

“No use begging. You don’t want to be in our paradise; you can get out of it.” He slaps you hard across the face as you fall on your knees with a thump. “By knowing exactly what hell is like.”

All you think about is Ray’s words as your hair clouds your vision with the humming sound of the ache on your face. His gentle smile.

_I want you to be mine. Truly mine._

_I want you to love me._

_Everything I have ever loved has withered away, YN._

I492 picks you up with ease and places you over one shoulder while putting the code on the door.  You fight to stay awake, but you are consumed by darkness. All you see is Ray’s gentle smile. The face of the man that has betrayed you 

* * *

 

You wake up with a groan. Your bleeding lip is stinging. You blink back tears as you stare at the back of the man that has brought you here. 

“Ray?” You call out whispery as tears fall and sting your aching cheek. The man turns around with wild, crazed eyes, but it’s not Ray. The room is dim, but you know it's not him.

“I am glad you’re awake. We’ve been waiting for you.”

“We?” You ask, fear lacing the word.

Four men stand up with hungry, evil looks on their faces and loom over you.

“We are so excited to play with you. It’s been so long since we have had a pretty girl down here,” a man with long hair says. Your scream lodges in your throat when he rushes to you and pulls you up by the hair.

“Ray!!” You scream. 

You’re not sure why you continue to call out his name, but you keep screaming it. Hoping in the depths of your heart that is all a lie. That you won't die here alone in this underground.

_I will protect you from now on.._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will post next chapter right after this one.


	10. A306

“You hurt our feelings calling for another man when you have us here.” Another man with white hair says as the man that holds your hair grabs one of your arms and folds it behind you in a way that makes your thighs buckle in pain. You are going to die here. You are sure. These men are crazy.

Your shirt is ripped without mercy and even as you kick and scream you feel like you make no impact. The only thing that breaks through you is the pain on your shoulder blades as your arm is yanked to keep you in place. You are not sure who seals your mouth shut, or who begins to pull on your skirt. All you can do is kick with all your might as these four men tell you the things they will do to you and how much they will enjoy it.

* * *

 

 Saeran walks the ornate halls, up the circular wooden stairs towards your room. He straightens his shirt, blows into his cupped palm to make sure he doesn’t stink. He hopes with all his heart that you'll be happy to see him. He frowns when Violet shocked face greets him.

“B-boss you’re early,” Violet’s voice trembles.

“Where is she?” He says with eyes tapered viciously and marching straight towards her. He unclenches and clenches his gloved hands his heart thumping in fear and fury.  Something is not right. Just as Violet’s lips quiver trying to find a response, an alarm begins to sound in the entire building. There is trouble. 

“She escaped!” Violet yells, taking the opportunity. She knows she has lost. Something has happened, and it will only be a matter of time before he finds out what she has done. It doesn’t matter if his hands end her life. She will happily give her life to him, would that girl do that for him?

Saeran swiftly turns on his booted feet and runs the way he came as she drops to her knees. “I did it for you. That woman will only hurt you.”

The tears fall from her amethyst eyes, but no one is there to wipe them away.

* * *

 

You stare in horror as the men that held you down kneel with pain. They groan and clutch at the collars on their neck. The doors open lighting inside and you swiftly drag away from them without questioning what is happening. 

“Let’s go!” You hear the familiar voice again. It’s A306! 

You jump on your feet without thinking about it, but the corrupted with long hair grabs your ankle and makes you fall face first. You turn to him, the light illuminating his crazed eyes, drool escaping the corner of his mouth that grits with pain. You kick him in the face and manage to escape his grasp. You don’t think about the fact that you are half-naked when you take his hand and begin to run.

“The alarms have sounded. I have disabled everything.” He explains quickly as you both head through the door and up the stairs, you came from. You pass a slumped over I492, and you pant in fear when you hear the raucous above you. “There are corrupted free,” V explains,” I disabled security measures of the section closest to the guards. That will keep them busy.” He takes off his cloak while he waits until the sound outside the door that leads to the hall dies down. He hands it to you turning away. You take It from him, realizing that t the only thing you wear is your skirt. You feel ashamed. Dirty. 

“I will distract them,” V mentions, his face intense. He hopes he can get out unscathed. He has a bag with another wig, cloak, and contacts hidden to allow him to escape. “When I say, you run out here. You will see a door on the back. Get out and keep running. It is the back exit. Keep running North; you will find an electric fence, but it will be disabled. You ask for help, okay?" 

“Okay,” you say and take the time to look at him. He is tall perhaps a bit taller than Ray. “Why are you saving me?”

“Because I can’t bare watch a good person get destroyed in front of me. Not again. I’ll protect you. It’s silent let’s go.” He thinks about Saeran and how he let Saeyoung down. How many people had he promised the same thing and failed? He opens the door and peers out and sees that the hall is empty.

You chuckle dryly behind him. 

“Protect me. Ray promised me the same thing, and he lied. I bet his revenge on R.F.A; all his suffering is a lie, too.”

You grip the lapels of your cloak as V’s masked eyes widen and he turns to you. “What did you say?!”

There is a sound on the end of the hall, and you run past him towards the back door. You turn slightly and bow, “Thank you, A306.”

V doesn’t have time to stop you to ask you what you said. Not if he wants you to escape. His heart races with the realization of exactly who you are. You are YN, the R.F. A’s party coordinator.

It takes four hours to subdue the escaped corrupted and get everything back to normalcy. Two of the guards have lost their face, chewed viciously by their most insane corrupted and Saeran is extremely pissed. He walks the  East stairs towards Savior’s throne room when a guard stops him.

“Mr. Ray, we’ve found her. She was just outside the compound.”

“Where is she?” 

“In the prisons, sir.”

He clenches his teeth. He doesn’t know how he will respond when he sees you. A part of him wants to grab you by the throat and kill you for betraying him, and another part wants to cry and ask you why. Why would you leave after the night you shared? Had you hated touching him that much? He walks a while, his thoughts racing. Had all the emotions you've shown him been false? He saunters down the dark corridor that leads to the underground prisons. He knows this place too well. It still makes his stomach knot.

* * *

 

You sit on the stone floor staring at a corner of the wall lost in thought. You almost made it. Almost. And if you did make it, where would you go? What would you do? You had no one. You wonder if that guy made it out.  You shiver, your throat is dry. You feel like curling up and dying. You turn when you hear the railed door slide open. Your eyes widen when you see Ray enter.

He hates how bruised your face looks; he doesn’t doubt your body hidden under that cloak is too. Your eyes are so red. He fights the urge to embrace you, to kiss your bruises. But you brought this on yourself. You don't want him. You tried to leave him. 

You stand up, and you shake in your anger when you see him standing there with that platinum hair and those mint eyes filled with just as much outrage as yours.  You rush at him so quickly that it surprises him. 

You begin to hit him, yelling at him in your anger. “You bastard! I hate you!”

Saeran manages to grab you by the wrist, shaking you, and taking hold of your throat until he slams you hard against the wall. His face is so close to you that you can feel his breath on your stinging bottom lip. “What the hell has gotten into you! Who do you have helping you escape, huh?!"

He squeezes your throat tightly as you continue to kick and then he lodges a knee between your legs to hold you still. “All your pity, all those crocodile tears were all fake to screw me over and escape while I was gone?” You frown taking in his words. Screw him over? “You even gave yourself to me to convince me, huh? Pretty smart. I give you that.”

There is pain on his face. His eyes are so glossy he looks like he is going to cry. How dare he makes this about him?

 “You are the one who betrayed me!! Telling Violet about what happened between us and placing me in a room with those men!" Your voice cuts off, but you continue. "I believed you when you said you'd protect me. I can't believe I even considered staying here with you." He lets you go, and you slide down the stone wall and hide your face on your knees. “You are the first man to ever touch me without me feeling disgusting, and you betrayed me. I won’t forgive you. You might as well kill me now. You lying bastard. If all you wanted was to sleep with me, you should've done it in that alley right after Jae raped me."

“Betrayed you?” His eyes widen with a shake of his head. "The corrupted touched you?” He squats and cups your face in panic. “They hurt you?” 

You turn your face away from his gaze. You feel like throwing up. “Don’t touch me!"

“I didn’t send you there. I was out on the job. I only returned because I left my laptop here. That damn Violet. She set us up. She knew I'd be gone." Ire reverberates on his every word when he thinks about her. How dare she touch what was his? How dare she try to hurt you. "I won't forgive her," he mutters. "I would never let anyone hurt you, you must believe me." You drag yourself away from him before he convinces you because he has power over you, a power you can't explain. He grabs you by the forearms and tugs you into an embrace. His warmth and strength make you feel safe. You fight it because you don't want to believe him. You attempt to push away, but he overpowers you. Maybe you are too tired. “I didn’t betray you. I would never betray you. You are mine. Why would I hurt what belongs to me?  I don’t know how she found out what happened between us, but I didn’t send you there, and I didn't tell her.” He buries his nose in your disheveled hair. “You have to believe me, YN. I even destroyed the people that have hurt you. It doesn't make sense for me just to throw you away." His arms tighten around you, and you clutch his back holding him just as tight. "You have no idea how happy I am to know you didn't escape from me. You really weren't leaving me?"

 

“No,” you say, burying deeper against his chest. He smells lightly like cologne and sweat. That sweet smell of him. “She said you would be there waiting for me. She said that you were done with me.” His temples tic. That fucking bitch will pay slowly. 

"Do you regret what happened between us last night?” he whispers, before his anger completely overwhelms him.

“No.” 

He continues to hold you tight, and you hear his heart race at your response. You look up at him, to find relief on his face. 

“I thought that you got tired of me. I thought that you were going to abandon me, too, but it was all Violet’s doing. Don’t you see that I’ve been watching you from the very beginning? I am so happy you are with me. I will never let you go." He looks away sadly. "I said I would protect you, but I failed you.”

He looks at you and wipes your silent tears with his thumbs. “I won’t let this happen to you again. I promise. The only way I can assure myself you don’t get hurt is by keeping you by my side and letting you know more about this place. But once you know, you can never leave, YN. Promise you'll stay." 

“I’ll stay.”

He leans in and peppers little kisses on your forehead, on your cheeks, and ends with a tender kiss on the lips.

“I am so happy. I can’t believe I will have someone of my very own. You can never leave my side, okay? If I can't take you with me, I'll lock you up where no one can bother you. I'll even install a little kitchen so you can cook your own meals when I am gone."

You nod again, the obsession in his words darkening his eyes. You're not sure why you are agreeing. Is it out of fear of ever returning to that dark place with those men? Or because you genuinely want to stay here with him, in a world where you belong to him. You feel shaken, confused, but elated that Ray didn’t betray you. You are so confused. That he still wants you…

“I want to know exactly what this place is, Ray, and why there are scary men like "them" here."

“You will,” he says cheerfully. “But you have to tell me of the man that helped you so I can thank him myself. Do you know his name?”

 

His smile hides the fact that he knows whoever helped you is a non-believer. He wonders if it’s that hypocrite. He has to admit he is grateful though...

“They called him A306.”

“Good girl. Thank you," he responds kissing your forehead.

“He was really nice.”

His smile cracks slightly when you speak about another man like that. Before he says something, the doors slide open.

“Mr. Ray, Savior wants to see you and the girl.”

Ray stands up and then gives you a hand. “We’re in trouble, YN. You caused quite a commotion.” He pulls you up and links his fingers with yours. “But you can finally meet a significant person to me. I’ll do the talking for you, okay? Promise me to behave? She'll be a little mad, but it's okay."

She?

“Okay,” you respond, and he squeezes your hand. He is tense you can feel it, and it’s not because of what you just told him or because of Violet.  Your heart jumps as you both walk out to meet his savior.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	11. Savior's Punishment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to try something new. This chapter and the next one will be told in Saeran's point of view. If you like it, I might consider doing more Saeran POV's in the future so let me know. I will update tomorrow (Lemon Chapter, wink-wink). I've been busy this weekend. :(

 

My hands have gotten so fucking clammy, yet I still hold on to your hand tightly as you do mine when we go up the stone steps out of the prisons. I am nervous and excited to show you to my Savior, even though I don’t like the circumstance in which you have to meet her. I would've liked for you to meet her when you weren’t so shaky, or scuffed, but despite the dirt on the side of your face, the bruise beginning to form on your cheek, and your messy hair, you still look so beautiful to me. You are such a gorgeous, kind, kind girl and the back part of my mind needles me with the thoughts that you shouldn’t be mine. That I have let you get hurt when I promised you I’d protect you. The sad part is that I will continue causing you pain, YN. That's what it means to be with me. I will protect you from others but I won’t protect you from myself. I know that. I know that one day you’ll end up hating me. The same voice that told me that my brother would one day return to me, tells me the least I could do is allow you to go back home…to allow you to go back to work in that homey little shelter. To finish your degree and become one with the world I no longer belong to.

You will survive without me.

I grind my teeth and pull you closer as we pass the guards that try not to stare too long. It’s been a while since I’ve listened to that damn voice and I will not start today. 

You said you’d stay, that is all the confirmation I need. It's not like I would let you go anyway, I know that, but knowing that you have chosen to stay with me out of your own free will arouses strange feelings in me.

“Ray?” You call out to me when we finally make it outside the squared stone building. The tiny building hides the immensity of the prisons underneath. You shield your eyes from the sun with your free hand.

“Hmm?” I turn to you, too lost in thought to appreciate how the sun lightens your hair and gives you this yellowish glow.

“This place,” you stumble on your words, you want to say something about it, but it scares you. I can feel it. “It’s some sort of cult, isn’t it?”

“A place of peace and salvation,” I respond, used to that description of Mint Eye, but I know that that simple answer won’t be enough to diminish your curiosity. My sweet curious girl.

We continue walking through dirt trail towards the cement one that leads to the green park. It’s spacious, with various fountains and plants, and if you ignore the guards that run back and forth trying to catch that son of a bitch that infiltrated here, it’s actually a peaceful place. 

“Those men,” you say again, I stop and turn to you. You look down at your feet, but I gently tug your chin up to face me. Your eyes are glossy and tired. “Why are those men like that?”

I debate if to tell you or not, but I decide that if you are going to stay with me it’s important for you to know things. I’ll reveal everything bit by bit.

“Those are men that couldn’t be saved. They are too lost in their darkness. All they want is to inflict pain. My Savior did her best to save each one. Instead of sending them back to the streets where they would be immediately disposed, they serve a special purpose here.”

“But that bald guard said that you punish people there. Do you hurt innocent people, Ray? Do you take women to be punished by those men?”

The concern and fear in your face both touch me and irritates me. I turn my face away from you because I can’t stand that way you look at me. 

“In order for our paradise to be at peace, we must enforce certain rules. Peace and salvation are not as black and white, YN. Nothing is. I won’t allow anyone to destroy what my Savior and I have built here. Corrupted are used as a last resort only.”

You are the one that looks away and I can’t interpret if it’s fear or concern or even both. Maybe my eyes look too intense, maybe I am terrifying. Maybe you are realizing that there is not an easy way out anymore.

You tighten your hands on the lapels of that oversized cloak. My temples tic at the thought of who gave it to you. All this talk and unease about meeting Savior has made me forget that you are still wearing the clothing of another man. That just before you were under the clutches of corrupted. I bite the inside of my cheek and take hold of your wrist so fast that you let out this tiny gasping sound. We walk a few steps when I nail you against the trunk of a tree that shadows us away from believer guards. With the entire place still on lock down the park is not as full as it usually is. 

You look up at me with those large eyes full of emotions as I pry your fingers from the lapels of your cloak and open it. A hiss escapes my lips just as the wind lets out a hiss of its own. Your beautiful exposed breasts, your nipples rising with the sensation of cold I am sure. There are scratches on your ribs. Your breathing increases as I continue taking you in, in the light. You are gorgeous.

“Ray,” you murmur, but you don’t stop me. You scrunch your eyes shut.

“Can you show me what those men did to you? Tell me every single detail.”

Your eyes fly open to meet mine.

“What did they do, YN?” I ask again, but I am not really asking. I want to know because this is the first thing I should’ve asked in the prison. But I was so happy to see you again that I completely forgot about everything. “I will make them pay for every single thing so tell me.” I hesitantly reach out to your breast even as my face begins to heat. My fingers gently stroke over that soft mound, my thumb brushing against that peak. Your hips wiggle, your lips part. “Did they touch you here.” 

My teeth work a number on themselves awaiting your response. I am taken by surprise when you lift your chest and your hand slaps atop of mine making me take your breast fully. 

You respond with the briefest, “No. I was saved just as they ripped my shirt.” You look down at my feet and then you face me again. Your chin lifted up to me. “They stroked my thighs.” You grab my wrist and lower me until I am palming under your skirt. I squeeze and feel you mine. Your skin so soft. Your thighs with just the right meat.

 I feel like I swallow a golf-ball as I stroke behind it, over it ever so closely between your thighs. “They grabbed my ass,” you confess quietly. Your face is now bleeding red and I realize, until now, that you are asking me to touch wherever they did to erase their traces. 

I enjoy that information. I am the man that can make you forget. My touch doesn’t repulse you.  

I cup your ass possessively when I crush you against me so tight that your breasts lift against me. I take you into a kiss that doesn’t care about the cut on the corner of your lips. You make a sound of pain but you continue to kiss me back anyway, wrapping your arms tightly around my neck pulling me deeper into your embrace. I want to take you to my room and make love to you so badly, but I know that I can’t keep Savior waiting.

With a curse, I break the kiss and cup your face. “YN. Promise me that you will do as I say with Savior. She is the leader of this place.” Confusion knits your brows. You attempt to say something, but I overrun your whispery voice. “ _Promise_ me.” 

The corner of your lips rises as you think it over, but agree. “Okay, but, you have to tell me exactly what is this place, Ray.”

“Deal. I’ll do the talking for you,” I say once more as I snap your cloak shut and take your wrist leading you towards Magenta.

* * *

 

         I look at you without turning as you take in the entirety of Magenta. I can’t interpret your emotions from your face, but there is a childlike surprise as you take in the polished woods and ornate decorations. The fresh flowers. You shy away from believers as they pass us, hiding behind me like a child, too.

“For eternal paradise,” one says with a deep bow. 

“For eternal paradise,” I respond and watch you look at me. God knows what you’re thinking, but it’s probably just a confirmation of what you already suspect. Cult is such an ugly word for this wonderful place. 

* * *

 

Through a guarded hall and down the hallway we reach Savior’s throne room. I begin to get agitated because she is probably angry. The guards stand aside as I rap the thick oak door with my knuckles. 

“I am here, my Savior.” 

“Come in,” her gentle voice says and I can tell that she is truly pissed. I look at you one more time. 

“Remember, YN.” 

You only nod as we enter. 

The throne room is spacious and elaborate. My savior is on her throne chair on the elevated canopy as she usually is. Quietly waiting, assessing the situation.  I drag you across the velvet flooring as I stand before the steps. 

“You wanted to see me?”

She stands up elegantly.  I see the tops of her shiny black shoes as she descends the three steps until she is at my level.

“My sweet, Ray. I am disappointed in you.” 

Her words make my heart clench. I never want to do anything to make her feel bad. She has done so much for me already.

“Please forgive me, Savior.” I let go of your hand and bow to her. “I take full responsibility for what has happened.”

“Oh, I expect no less,” she says, eyeing you, but you continue looking down like a good girl. “Violet has confessed what she has done, but I am afraid a punishment is still in order.” She pauses, rakes her long fingers through her blond curls as she steps in front of you. “But before we do any of that, I do believe I need to introduce myself to your friend. You are, YN, aren’t you?”

I didn’t expect Savior to talk to you herself so when you look at me questioningly I don’t respond fast enough. 

“Y-yes,” you say, unsure. Savior smiles as she stares you over. “I was informed that you tried to escape with a traitor.” 

You look at me for a response. 

“She had no idea. Violet tricked her into believing I had sent her to the corrupted.”

Savior’s green eyes widen in concern. She wraps her arms around you in an embrace that completely shocks you.

“Oh, you poor girl. Are you okay?”

Her face is awfully close to you. It’s the first time I see her act in such a way that I am not sure what is happening.

“I am f-fine,” you respond, you are freaked out. I can tell. 

“Good,” she says with a smile, “Now concerning your punishment.”

“What?!” You respond along with me.

Savior turns to me and smiles stopping in front of me again.

“Believers are used to a certain type of authority. What does it say about me as your Savior if I allow what happened today go unpunished? Whether it was because of Violet or not, the point is I lost two believer guards and the girl you said would be no trouble, caused us the biggest trouble in the longest time, Ray. If you can't keep your things under control, I must do so for you." 

“It wasn’t my fault!” You retort and I hate myself for what I do, but you are already on thin ice.

I grab you hard by the hair, I make it hurt before I push you to the floor. “I said quiet, YN.” 

 Savior stares at you even as you look at me with death in your eyes, she seems satisfied with what I have done so she says.

“Good boy, Ray. I know how difficult it is to punish someone you care about.” 

She smooths my hair back and strokes my face like a loving mother while you continue glaring at me. 

“I take her punishment," I say under my breath. "Since she is mine, it is only right for me to be responsible for all she does. I'll deal with Violet later."

She stays quiet for a while.

“Oh, my child,” she says sadly as she places her head against my chest. "You must really care for this girl" She looks at you and then back at me. “You will be punished in front of all our believers for your crime. You will be whipped five times for each hour that it took us to control the corrupted.”

“No,” I hear you say painfully. "Please." 

You are defending me. Oh, YN. You make me the happiest man in the world. I hurt you and you continue to defend me. 

Savior turns to look at you, “And you will watch my child. So you can see how your actions will hurt Ray from now on."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	12. Beautiful

 

“It wasn’t his fault!” You call out rising to your feet. “It was Violet!” 

I don’t say a word as Savior's lips stretch to a sympathetic smile. “It has been decided. Certainly, it is not fair, but we must face the consequences regardless. It is the way the world works, child. I assure you that Violet’s punishment will be grander than what will happen to Ray.”

You clench your fists and look down, “I can take it.” I frown confused at what you mean until you repeat yourself. “I can take his punishment for him.” If I could be knocked dead right here, where I stood, I would.

Savior goes to you and takes you by the wrist. She strokes the skin on the top of your hand. 

“How kind of you, YN. I wonder why you would sacrifice yourself for Ray. If I am not mistaken he didn’t bring you here out of your own free will. Are you planning on sacrificing yourself out of protection for him or out of repayment?” 

Her question peaks my interest too. I turn to you, but you can’t meet my eyes. Could it be that you are attempting to cut even with me? To repay me so you have no reason to stay? That fact makes me desperate and if that is the case I rather be whipped until my back breaks if it means you will be forever indebted to me. If it means you will always stay by my side. 

You don’t answer. You can’t answer. I wish that I could read your thoughts.

“Savior. Take me to the post,” I respond, I hate how panicky I sound.

Savior glances at me, but you remain still even when the guards come and lead me to the punishment room. I glance at you over my shoulder to only catch the hint of tears sliding down your cheeks. Savior whispers something in your ear as she snakes her arm around the crook of your elbow and takes you with her.

* * *

 

            The room is dully lit with only the spotlight that shines a whipping post and where a masked guard stands with a thick whip in hand. The punishment room looks more like an auditorium, it is where believers are punished and sometimes disposed of. The swishing sound of the whip makes my throat dry. I truly do hate pain. I don’t have such a high pain tolerance, but I have learned to deal with it. Physical pain is nothing compared to emotional that is for certain. I try to get courage by thinking that after this is over you will be bound to me forever like the scars that will remain etched on my back. It is almost like a marriage contract. They will be the reminder of what you have caused. In a way, I feel grateful to Violet. I turn to you with a smile but I find you pleading to Savior in the seat next to her. She doesn’t even turn to you and when you rise from your seat a guard digs his fingers on the tops of your shoulders and sits you back down.  You both are just a few feet away, while believers watch from the higher seats. Soon a guard brings in another chair that Violet occupies. Violet begins to cry, but she follows the rules unlike you who keeps trying to rip away from the guards. I walk few steps more towards the post leaving the guards behind. I take off my shirt and kneel. I hug the pole tight and look back one last time to see Savior wiping her tears and you coming right towards me.

“YN,” I whisper. You look so scared, so tired. A guard forces you to sit right beside me. 

“Ray,” your voice cracks with my name and soon the Punisher grabs the bucket of water just by his booted feet and splashes it on my back. You flinch as it falls on you and without a second wait the whip reverberates against my wet back. I cry out in grating pain, my skin feels like is being torn in two, a fire that extends all the way to my feet. My body jolts involuntarily but I remain still looking only at you. You cry for me, you try to reach for me, but you are pulled back by the hair. I memorize the faces of each believer that touches you. I will dispose of every single one. Another blow makes me bite down on my lip until it bleeds. I can still hear you calling me, my Savior crying. I am the luckiest man alive. 

I have you. I have her. 

By the third lash, my eyes have gotten blurry, but I see you when you lunge at the Punisher and beg him. He ignores you continuing with his duty. You are grabbed by the hair again much fiercer than I had done.  I stand up in fury watching the way that man yanks you excruciatingly by your lovely hair, but the fourth lash brings me back to my knees. My vision turns black and all I can see are glimpses of you continuing to cry out that fucking name that is not mine.

* * *

 

I wake up with a weighty headache and my back is killing me. I am stomach down and when I try to stand up I hear you.

“Ray. Be careful.” 

I groan as I manage to roll over, you place your hand on the ball of my shoulder and help me sit up. We are in one of the extra rooms no one occupies. It’s tiny. There is a tray of food on the table beside me. You glance at me and then at the tray.  You look different. There is a tenderness in your eyes and I wonder what have you been up to since I’ve been knocked out. 

“H-how long have I been asleep?” 

“A day and a half,” you say smilingly as you go to get the apple juice on the tray. You fumble with the straw and then you bring it to me. You sit on the edge of the bed and take the straw to my lips. I can feel the sore of my bite on the corner of it. I drink thirstily watching you, my hair pasted on my forehead. I wonder if Savior has talked to you. I begin to cough for drinking too fast. You immediately put the cup on the table that is at hands reach and pat my thigh because my back is messed up and probably a bloody mess.

When I recover I stare at the skirt you are wearing. You look clean, but that skirt is too short. I don’t like it. 

“You want something to eat, Ray?”

I stare at the food and shake my head. “I am not hungry.”

“You have to try so you can recover quicker,” you scold, you are about to stand up when I take hold of your wrist and sit you back down.

“What have you been up to without me?”

“I was with Savior,” you say simply, an emotion dancing in your eyes tells me that you guys got personal. “I went to the garden. That’s all.” 

That answer satisfies me, but I still feel restless until you stare between my legs at the tent under the covers. You look at me then and smile as if you are about to burst out laughing. I turn away embarrassedly. I am in pain, but I am hard too. I turn to you as you pull the covers away from my lap. Aside from the bandages wrapped around my torso, I am completely naked which has me completely exposed. My erection hard as steel has no care in the world. I groan when you wrap it in your hand. The feel of your hot palm is a feeling that is indescribable.  You lift in bed until you are between my legs then you lean down and take it into your mouth. 

God, the feel of your parted lips as you begin sliding me inside you is such a beautiful image. I don’t know why you are doing this for me. I don’t know why you are compelled to do this for me but I am grateful either way because when you take me deeper all I can do is thrust and slide my fingers into your hair. 

“YN,” I say hoarsely, as you nibble over the head and your tongue slides down the base to slurp back up. My temples tic, my teeth gnash together, because the sensation is so delicious that I am fighting to keep from coming. You look at me with your large eyes laced with desire. 

You stroke me in your palm, “If you are in pain we can stop, Ray.” 

“No,” I breathe leaning forward and tugging your shirt. You let go of me just to slide that camisole away. Your breasts are swiftly exposed to me. I tweak your nipples softly as you lean to take me back into your mouth. Your tongue laps away eagerly leaving no part of me untasted and YN, I feel like I love you. I do love you because you are such a kind girl. I want to be gentle as I thrust into the suction of your tongue and lips, but I also want to grab you tightly by the hair and make you choke on me. I can’t decide what to do until I am already pushing your head down, forcing you to take my entire length.

 “Breathe,” I whisper hoarsely as you begin to gag, the squeezing of your throat, your fingers curling on my thighs as you try to break free,  it is such a mind-numbing sensation. I allow you free and you pop back up as if you were just underwater, you cough, saliva mixed with my precum dribbles down the corner of your lips towards your chin. For a second, I am scared that you will get angry at me, but although your eyes are watery and rimmed red, your lips take me again and swallow me whole until all I can do is breathe heavily with you and the squelching noises your mouth and my cock make.

I push you back a bit too harshly because I want to cum on your breasts. I groan in pain as I kneel and finishing myself all over you. My aim is your two round mounds of flesh but it falls on your face, on your rosy lips, even on your beautiful hair and I have never seen a sight more beautiful than you covered with ropes of my cum.

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
